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Forgiveness

by Girlpool

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1.
Do you even want me if I even have to ask? Break it to me gently with your fingers up my ass Kiss me like you mean it Though I don’t know what you’re meaning Bite my tongue until it bleeds I’ll smile at the feeling yeah You’re a liar push my head down when I least expect it Choking on the words I say I know that I’ll regret this You’re so hot But still so cold Just wafting through my doorway Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say All my dreams are damaged Yeah I know I’m hypnotized Hold me down until I scream or til you empathize You’re a liar push my head down when I least expect it Choking on the words I say I know that I’ll regret this You’re so hot But still so cold Just wafting through my doorway Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say Nothing gives me pleasure like the things I know you won’t say
2.
I always try to get her back you know that’s why I’m showing up like that Pass out in a day dream cum so much to memory Twist me over the sink knock out my envy let it go She comes through the door She drives me crazy when she sings a lie love lullaby tease me in a sin too tight What’s a lie love lullaby when we sing it every night? When we sing it every night What’s a lie love lullaby when we sing it every night? My girl gives the world to you she’ll do just what you ask her to call my name behind the bar kiss me like you won’t go far I fear my innocence I remember how it goes Pushed against the door She drives me crazy when she sings a lie love lullaby tease me in a sin too tight What’s a lie love lullaby when we sing it every night? I still wonder if you’re not alone like did you move on I think I’d know cuz under the crying stars tonight her and I repeat the way we both know how it always goes I love the scarcity Quiet cling pretend to me Never quite enough for me Sing a lie love lullaby Last time tonight And we sing it every night What’s a lie love lullaby when we sing it every night? (What’s a lie love lullaby?) And we sing it every night And we sing it every night (What’s a lie love lullaby?) And we sing it every night And we sing it every night (What’s a lie love lullaby?) And we sing it every night And we sing it every night
3.
Violet 03:28
She was older she had a dream and I fit it She was blond but between us it was violet Now I drive my car park it behind your restaurant job When you get off, we’ll take off Cuz oh I feel too visible On the roadside I put her hand on mine and Violet cried LA’s trash but filled with diamond candy Running with you cuz you’re sticky sweet and pretty When you held me like a doll that’s when I felt so fucking strong but without lust I get lost Oh which one of us got wrong There’s a murder kiss dying on my lips I’d say anything to make a minute from that day one I don’t wanna throw away Oh I feel too visible Oh I feel too physical Violet was a falling star I couldn’t catch or put in my pocket Even if I could I dont think that I’d want it Ohhh Ohhh Ohhh
4.
Junkie 03:34
I’m a junkie for you Cuz I’d die to love you I wake up in the evening Dreaming of where she’s been She’s the prayer I bury Like the cross I carry And heaven’s in the mezzanine Of our church in Aberdeen I’ll repent Maybe not Hold a candle up to God If you want me you got me baby Let your body destroy and change me I’m a sin for the saint you make me Let your body destroy and change me I’m a junkie for you Cuz I’d die to love you I know I’m misbehaving If I’m not confessing Cuz she’s the prayer I bury Like the cross I carry And Daddy’s in the graveyard Digging through my doll parts I’ll repent Maybe not Hold a candle up to God If you want me you got me baby Let your body destroy and change me I’m a sin for the saint you make me Let your body destroy and change me Everybody preaches someone to believe in She’s the blow up my nose And the sun as it rose If you want me you got me baby Let your body destroy and change me I’m a sin for the saint you make me Let your body destroy and change me
5.
I want my innocence back I don’t wanna be this bad But I’m so insecure these days Still chasing the heart I pushed away It’s like last year put a hand on my face Over my eyes and I drifted away Sometimes I feel you noticing me But I’m just dragging my life into a dream Dragging my life into a dream Baby you were right, making up my mind is hard for me I want my enemy back At this house in the hills Am I imagining her laugh? How did I get to wishing for you? It’s that time of the night That’s what going to parties do And you’re probably at one too I bet you’re close and my friends know not to tell me the truth Cuz hearing anything about what you do Makes me want to drag my life into Dragging my life into a dream Baby you were right making up my mind is hard for me But I wonder what you’d think of me now That’s why I hold my breath when I go into town Cuz I’m hoping I’ll run into you somehow Would you drag your life back into mine right now Would you drag your life back into mine right now (I want my innocence back) Would you drag your life back into mine right now (I want my innocence back) Would you drag your life back into mine right now
6.
Faultline 04:11
Everyday it’s Friday night I hold my body like a butcher knife Smiling for the camera eyes closed Doing anything you ask I suppose You tell me you would die to breathe me in I know there’s no excuse for oxygen So I will make your bed my graveyard Let the world run through my soft parts And I live at this faultline Between the edge of solitude and hope I’m shaking in a sentimental trope And all the stars apologize for night I don’t blame them I’ve wanted to sometimes I don’t know what to tell you where I’ve been My body’s just a landscape for your sin And all the days regrets the city lights I know its just the fault of the faultline Every week keeps slipping by In this imitation paradise The angels make me sorry when I err From the way they want me everywhere Can’t you see I’m sinking further in Wish you could reimburse my oxygen I gave you everything and then some more Left you with nothing to be looking for Will I die at this Faultline? Between the edge of entropy and woe I wanted everything so much it grows Until I can’t manage this appetite I loved you so traumatically that I Can barely lift the world you left for me There’s lots of ghosts I somehow still can see Holding onto me for our dear life All these bodies always touching mine
7.
Why did I show you that I can carry you? That I’ll give gold to you? And I’ll light up later? I’ll stay unconcerned, when you lock my morning out Forget that I keep it left out And I’ll light up later Why did I- I show you that I That I can carry you? And I’ll give gold to you? And I’ll light up And I’ll light up And I’ll light up Why did I show you that I can carry you? That I’ll give gold to you? And I’ll light up later? I’ll stay unconcerned when you lock my morning out Forget that I keep it left out And I’ll light up later And I’ll light up And I’ll light up later
8.
Country Star 04:11
I wish he had taken all of me When I got run over by a country star When he stood over me I said you sing beautifully Then we drove slow to his song on the radio He hit that note until his voice broke You’re the country star that lights up my sky You’re the first one to make me feel right I wanna be your sin boy baby Company that you’ve waited to meet Me keep me hiding it don’t tell no one I don’t want them to see We sit at home she smiles next to me She’s sweet like candy We live comfortably Her name’s on my hip, where I tattooed it But when I get too high in my devilish mind I’ll make a dream to quit while reality slips When he leaned me back in his classic car I knew what it was like to want a country star I wanna be your sin boy baby Company that you’ve waited to meet Me keep me hiding it don’t tell no one I don’t want them to see (Don’t want them to see) (Don’t want them to see) With your help you put god on my mouth I’m still on that How’d you do that With your help you put god on my mouth I’m still on that How’d you do that (Don’t want them to see) You’re the country star that lights up my sky You’re the first one to make me feel right You’re the country star that lights up my sky You’re the first one to make me feel right You’re the country star that lights up my sky You’re the first one to make me feel right You’re the country star that lights up my sky You’re the first one to make me feel right
9.
Are you the moonlight that shines onto my shelf? I dreamt I held me But I was someone else You’re in my eyes now, You’re clouding up my sight You were the danger, You were the breath of life We were just children when I was 22 I thought I loved me enough for even you I drank your poison With holy water pride I was in danger Disguised as cosmic light Said there’s no reason To go on for just another day Would you now tell me Everything is finally okay? Cause there’s butterfly bulletholes On the inside of my skull Dying was your final cry Cause living was a pretty lie Everything is still the same The flowers look at me the same way But I’m holding on for my dear life Confusing bullets for butterflies Now you’re the omen But you’re the devil too Why can I fear them But I can’t fear you? And what is it like? Within the world of night I wanna know how to live without a fear of life Cause there’s no reason To hold onto you another day Cause something tells me Everything is finally okay With these butterfly bulletholes On the inside of my skull Living was too hard to try So you’d rather close your eyes and die I don’t think that I’m the same Even though it looks that way Cause I’m holding on for my dear life Confusing bullets for butterflies
10.
Afterlife 03:11
I’ve got no tricks I just give you my body Tell me a lie You’ll disguise as a story I won’t tell you shit Nothing more to say I hide monsters in my head everyday I hide monsters in my head everyday I’ve got no dreams Nothing left to believe in Nothing to grieve As I stare at the ceiling You’re the weight of god And the antichrist Wonder what I’ll hear them say As the rumors fly Wonder what I’ll hear them say In the afterlife I know that the devil sleeps Cause he sleeps with me I hear him whispering even in my dreams I know the devil sleeps Cause he sleeps with me I hear him whispering even in my dreams I’ve got no tricks I just give you my body Recite the lines That you learned to disarm me I won’t tell you shit Am I supposed to say I hide monsters in my head everyday? I hide monsters in my head everyday I hide monsters in my head everyday
11.
See Me Now 03:09
Baby what I meant Is I get thoughts that make me sick They ask me if I’m good for this and I am I don’t want you feeling it There's open doors pushing on my head And I don’t want you seeing what I fit in What I’m worth, It goes up every night I get paid with her eyes Does my baby know I’m not that right? I get stuck on what I can’t give The internet helps me forget That I got doors that open they push on my head Talking mean about my strength Like no I’m not enough like him Oh, my hands don’t fit like his on you Oh, he’s playful careless goes where he wants to When I was young, for a girl I was tough Now I’m figuring out how you see me now I don’t wanna overthink The things I hope her friends don’t say But I’ve got doors that open they push on my head Talking mean about my strength Like no I’m not enough like him Wondering if you’ve looked at old pictures of my band I’ve got doors that open they push on my head
12.
Love333 03:09
Baby got what he wanted all along Baby got all my loving and a song Piece of work, I’m a world away I count the ways that you’ll never change Close my eyes, make my dreams so real I don’t remember anything I felt, ah What’s love? Life’s a fraction of All the things that I felt from drugs There’s a haze over my eyes I wonder if there’s any truth sometimes I was looking at something that looked just like love I was looking at something that looked just like love I was looking at something that looked just like love I was looking at something that looked just like love God I’m lost in that sunken holy place Sold my soul to someone that I could replace I close my eyes cause my dreams are real I can’t remember anything that’s left I don’t wanna feel this yet Something more real than I’d expect ah What’s the point? There’s no peace of mind That’s the truth I don’t wanna find There’s a haze over my eyes I wonder if there’s any truth sometimes I was looking at something that looked just like love I was looking at something that looked just like love I was looking at something that looked just like love I was looking at something that looked just like love

credits

released April 29, 2022

Written by Girlpool
Produced by Yves Rothman
Engineered by Yves Rothman, Jesse Newport , Jake Supple
Additional engineering by Ainjel Emme
‘Nothing Gives Me Pleasure’ & ‘Lie Love Lullaby’ Produced by Yves Rothman & Ben Zelico
'Light Up Later' Additional Production by Zach Fogerty
Mixed by Lawrence Rothman
Mastered by Pete Lyman at Infrasonic Sound , Nashville, TN
Recorded at Saturn Sound , Hollywood CA

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Girlpool Los Angeles, California

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